Positive

Thursday is showing little sprinkles of promise. Today is going to be a good day. This weekend is going to be a good weekend. I may be broke but there are good things in my future so I need to focus on those! I am every month I am getting closer and closer to paying off my car and credit card. I still have a ways to go but seeing that number get smaller and smaller makes me have hope that someday I will be (pretty much) debt free!!!

I have Taylor this weekend and that makes me happy! She has a birthday party to attend on Sunday. I think it is going to be cold so not sure what else we can do. Have to think of a craft or something to keep us busy!! Yesterday was 100 day at school so the kids are supposed to wear or bring something that shows the number 100.

She and I made this lovely crown with 100 glitter dots. It was messy but FUN.

Motions

The holidays came and went and now I am broke. With the cold weather making photography slow I am literally counting my change to get through to the next month. This isn't fun and makes me sad. Will my life always be like this? Will I be stuck in this little apartment barely scraping by for the rest of my life?

I wanted so much more for myself.

Spending my 30’s single and broke isn't what I pictured. I had dreams like everyone else, of a life filled with love, a happy family, a house, a yard, vacations, back yard BBQ, growing old with someone.

I know there are TONS of people worse off.  I am only 33 and there are still lots ahead of me (I hope) but today I am in the dumps feeling like this life is sucking me down. Pushing me into a place I will be stuck in forever.

So for now I am just breathing, going through the motions. What else can I do?  Life goes on.